January 21st 2018.
‘Make your life a masterpiece; imagine no limitations on what you can be, have or do.’
21 Things You Should Know About Mental Health.
21) A mental illness is not just one problem, there are many different types of mental health issues such as; PTSD, Anxiety, Depression, ADHD, Substance Abuse.
I suffer from Anxiety and Depression. Did you realise I never said ‘suffered’. Just because I have finished CBT, one-to-one Therapy and stopped taking medication to get my illness under control, it does not mean it has miraculously disappeared. It will most likely always be there, there is no cure there are just better coping methods and remembering what works for you, which I have spent a long time trying to figure out what works for me.
20) Trying to understand somebody with a mental illness can be frustrating for them. Just accept that sometimes you cannot help, if they need you/help leave them until they are ready.
I have many people around me who love to help. But I never accept it. I’m so strong willed and love to figure things out myself without asking for help. Being told that people understand what I am going through really frustrates me. You may have the same illness but you do not have the same day-to-day problems as I do. So if you ever find yourself in this situation, wait until you are told about their feelings before presuming- it makes life easier for all of us.
19) Most people become spiritual and rely on something greater than their own mind to seek help.
This is something I have been advised to do and tried, but unfortunately I did not work for me personally.
18) Living with any mental health issue can feel like you’re trapped with no way out by becoming a permanent worry to yourself.
Sometimes it felt like I had lost control of my own mind. I had no control over my thought process, over my actions, over my reactions, over myself. It is all about re-training your mind to think positively and let things go!
17) Their greatest talent is pretending. Pretending that nothing is going on, pretending that everything is fine and pretending that they don’t need help.
If you asked me who ate all the chocolate from the fridge and I lied, you would 100% be able to tell I was lying because of my face. But there is a difference between lying and pretending. I pretended I was okay until I heard a specific name then I’d have to walk away. I couldn’t physically sit in a room whilst others discussed this person because it hurt me too much. I pretended I was okay until I felt rejection. Rejection for me is one of my biggest fears but I’m working on it! I pretended I was okay until I was told ‘no’. Then I would blame everybody for my problems. When in all honesty it wasn’t my fault. It was my mental health issues that blurred the lines between normality and anxiety.
16) Anything can trigger a panic attack or over thinking, so remember to smile. You do not know what others are going through.
I have a real phobia of smiling at people and they don’t smile back. I could be having the most productive day I have had all week, but that one person could effect my mood in an instant. You could also be having the worst day ever and not in the mood to smile- but if you’re both smiling at each other, that’s the first step to becoming happier.
15) Learning about mental health if you are suffering yourself, can be the ultimate power to getting the control of your life back.
I wish I had done this sooner. I said in the past so many times ‘I need to see a DR’ but I never did it. I used it as an excuse. I pretended I would so everything would go back to the way I liked it. But I was wrong. I should’ve learnt about triggers, how to deal with life in general, in a relationship, living at home etc.
14) Unfortunately, if you need a therapist, they don’t know everything, they just assess you and work on those things. You can come out the other end, no matter how long it takes.
My therapist was a saint! She helped me so much I don’t think she realised. I had a non-judgemental person that was willing to sit with me for 1 hour a week and help me. Just me. My self-worth was my main issue. I had been in so many bad relationships, had so many bad friendships, that I forgot who I was. I spent my entire life trying to please everybody else but myself.
13) ‘Trial and Error’ is often used when trying to get better. Remembering how you’ve trained your mind to work for you is the trick!
I’m still getting better but I’m progressing and that’s really all that matters. Like I said in yesterday’s blog, Remembering is KEY!
12) It’s easier to cope if you’re your own treatment provider. Gaining knowledge, tracking your moods, keeping a journal, what coping methods work for you are KEY!
I began doing this. I wrote a journal for a little over 2 weeks. I tracked how I felt that day and talked about small trivial things that either annoyed me/ upset me/ triggered an episode. I have read back over it once and I doubt I will ever do it again. I don’t want to remember how bad I felt 3 months ago, I want to focus on the future. The trick is to never read back over a journal, it’s in the past.
11) The illness ‘depression‘ does not mean you are sad all of the time.
This is the huge misconception with ‘depression’. The general feeling is detachment. Having a detachment from things that used to make you happy. Having a detachment from things that could make you happy. I started doing things I love again, and i’m really enjoying it! It’s all about remembering yourself.
10) Self-harm is NOT a cry for attention. It does NOT mean you want to kill yourself.
For some people, like me, I used it as a coping mechanism because the pain from hurting myself was a greater pain than what my mind was telling me I was feeling. There are so many better/ less harmful ways of dealing with stress/ anxiety/ depression- it’s just about finding what is best for you.
9) Judging is one of the worst things you could do to somebody who suffers.
This illness made me one of the most self-loathing people I’ve ever known. I constantly told myself I wasn’t normal. When will I be normal? Do I look normal? If I look normal everybody will think i’m normal? BUT what is normal? There really is not any kind of normal in the world. The sooner you realise that the better!
8) After somebody has admitted they need help, it does not make them a different person.
I felt a sense of ‘rush’ when I finally went to my first Triage meeting. Nothing that was done around me was intentional and I wouldn’t have known how to deal with such big news either. But I didn’t change. I still felt the same feelings. I still got anxious about the same thing. I still managed to get myself into a state of uncontrollable sobbing because I thought I would never be good enough! Please remember this.
7) Mental Illness’ are, most of the time, invisible.
It is hard to see from the naked eye if somebodies mind is a little different to our own. It is more common than you think and can ruin lives just as easily as a physical illness. Like I said before, pretending is one of our stronger traits.
6) The word ‘crazy’ is very insulting.
We are not crazy, we are just different. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
5) There are many signs to look out for: feeling useless, overthinking, lack of energy or motivation or avoiding other people.
I always felt useless, like my best was never good enough. This applied to every aspect of my life. I couldn’t help it. I always overthought things. ‘Why is she looking at me like that?’, ‘Do I look stupid today?’, ‘Why does everybody hate me?’, ‘No body ever listens to me.’ I never had motivation until the beginning of 2018. I always pretended I was interested in getting a job. I always pretended I was interested in doing things but in all honesty I was not. I always avoided people, mostly my family. Because I was embarrassed. Now I find comfort in talking about my issues.
4) ‘75% of people with a mental health condition will have developed it before the age of 18′.
When I was doing research myself, I found this quote and its hard to get out of my mind. Its terrifying to know that three quarters of people with a mental illness have suffered from teenage years, just like myself. It’s hard to accept that you need help, but once you do it really does help.
I’m 22. I have only ever accepted I needed help when I was 22. I have achieved so much already at the age of 22. But before that I had suffered for many year unknowingly. There is no time limit to recovery.
3) Suicide should never be an option.
There are so so many different facilities and services available so please never feel like you’re alone. There is always another option.
2) Take time to reflect on why you think your life is so bad, it’s because we haven’t demanded control of our own lives.
That is exactly what I did. With the help of NHS services and great people around me, I demanded control of my life back. And guess what, It feels amazing.
1) Never give up!!
This is what the depression wants. This is what the anxiety wants.
Be yourself, you can beat this.
‘Accept and embrace newness with open arms!’ There are plenty of things that could be see as ‘too-good-to-be-true’ but try not to think about it. Embrace your journey and make mistakes. If you’re happy now, that’s perfectly fine. Enjoy what you can right now because some day it might all be gone and all you’re left with is memories. So… carry on & stop worrying, you’re doing just fine.
TRAINING
365 Days Of Happiness 